Why I Stopped Taking Myself So Seriously. My Leadership Lessons from the Mirror.

2024-11-06
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Seeing leadership as an invitation to be fully human, rather than constantly flawless - has changed how I do business. Today I wish to share with you, why I stopped taking myself so seriously and how that decision led me to lead with more empathy, clarity and true connection.

Many of us have been raised on stories of the “perfect leader” - a person who could command respect, who had every answer and who made it all look easy. But as I stepped into my role at some stage of my professional career, I quickly discovered two things:

No one has all the answers and pretending to does no one any favors.

People relate better to the real you than the ideal you.

The truth is: there’s no easier way to be authentic than to allow yourself the occasional laugh at your own expense. I call this “Leadership from the Mirror.” It’s a constant check-in with myself staring back at me and a reminder that I am as human as everyone else in the room.

Lesson 1 Leaders are often tempted to present a perfect image, but perfection doesn’t foster trust; vulnerability does. I remember a time when I made a major strategic error. Rather than insisting on a theory, that it is “part of the plan,” I’ve decided to take a bit of distance and admit to my team, “Well, this one looked a lot better on paper.”

People didn’t lose confidence and appreciated the honesty. Instead of focusing on the mistake, we moved forward together.

Lesson 2 Humor in leadership doesn’t mean cracking jokes all day. It’s all about perspective. Humor is the ability to look at a challenge and see it as manageable. It’s the power to regroup and solve problems in a fresh way.

When we face a challenging client, instead of launching into a defensive strategy meeting, we can choose an approach without tension. We keep stress down and creativity up - a combination that leads our team always to best client solutions.

Lesson 3 Leaders who hold themselves to an impossible standard, end up setting the same standard for everyone else. But a culture of innovation requires accepting imperfection. The best ideas in our company have come from people who felt safe enough to “risk looking silly.”

It is so often, when biggest successes start as an idea someone proposed half-jokingly, starting with: “I know this sounds crazy, but…” If we don’t give our daily operations some oxygen, kick the ideas around, we might miss out on many massive opportunities. My job as a leader isn’t to push for flawless ideas; it’s to encourage fresh ones, however unconventional they may seem.

Lesson 4 Throughout my journey I learned something simple: if you’re laughing at yourself, you’re automatically on your team’s side. One day, after a technical glitch during a big presentation, I looked around and said, “Alright, so it turns out I am a mere mortal, confirmed.” We all laughed, tension dropped and we delivered a great session.

People want leaders who can roll with the punches. They want a person who brings them together, not a persona that separates them. Being able to laugh at myself has kept me connected to my team in a way I could never accomplish by keeping a rigid distance.

The mirror shows us our flaws, but what we can also see is the potential to bring our most genuine selves into every interaction.

Leadership is about standing side by side with those we’re honored to lead.

So, every time I look in my mirror, I try not see a “leader” but simply me, doing my best. I smile or even laugh a little. Once I do, I can see those around me feel freer to bring their whole selves to the table too.

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